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narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via icrashedmycarintoasquiddd)

me:wow i have so much work to do
me:*goes on tumblr*
me:*watches a movie*
me:*reads a novel*
me:*takes a nap*
me:*climbs a mountain*
me:*backpacks through europe*
me:why am i not getting anything done

the fact that 66 + 44 doesn’t add up to 100 really pisses me off

(Source: dampsandwich, via thesexualunicorn)

howlsmoving-asshole:

howllor:

oh my godddddd there is a new swedish reality tv show where they are tracking down internet trolls and confronting them about the death threats they’ve sent to people, since it’s actually illegal.

watching them try to explain how it’s not them is the best entertainment i’ve ever seen.

this episode ended with them fining him 5000 SEK to be paid to the victim!

guess what America should do

(via bleedingheartworks)

emptyparkinglot2am:

I would sit in a parking lot with you at 2am

(Source: holmyhan, via thesexualunicorn)

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